Tag: character

Catch Them In The Feels: Adding Emotional Impact to a Scene

Quan

A staple of fiction is the tragic scene. It’s when something happens within a story that truly tugs at the heartstrings of the reader and gets them to feel the raw emotion of whatever is happening. You’ve seen it everywhere from movies to video games to comics and novels. Some entire franchises were built on these moments.

But generating that emotional response is a tricky thing to accomplish. it can be overdone and underdone. It can feel artificial or manipulative. It can lack the necessary punch or feel soulless. So the question is how do you as a writer craft together a moment that truly, naturally elicits an emotional response from the reader?

There are many ways to approach a moment with this intent. It does not always have to be something tragic. In Terry Pratchett’s Snuff, a young, delicate goblin girl does a gesture of kindness and trust for Samuel Vimes. The moment is handled with intimacy and tenderness, from the demure girl’s movements to her haunting, profound proclamations of hearts needing to give. The girl was portrayed as delicate, precious and fragile, with a big, trusting heart for the hero of the story. I know when I read it, I truly felt for this little goblin in a way I rarely felt for secondary characters, and I truly wanted Vimes to do the right thing for her. It was a mesmerizing scene.

I tried to accomplish something similar in The Hand You’re Dealt. The scene where Jay is feeling great about a recent job interview only to have his hopes crushed moments later was something I drew from real life experience. So it was easy to articulate his slow realization that his interview did not go as well as he thought, and all of his hopes and plans for the future were dashed in that moment. But I chose to portray that moment through the eyes of his girlfriend Tika, as she witnesses his dejection firsthand and feels helpless and unable to console him. She cares for him, so she emphasizes with his despair, and in that scene she literally cries the tears he is trying to hold back. After finishing the first draft of that scene, I read it to my wife, who is not a fan of my writing in any way, shape or form. But the scene actually brought a tear to her eye because it actually took her back to that very moment where she was at my side and something similar happened to me. (How that failed to make her more interested in reading my stories I will never know, but I digress).

So the question is how do you as a writer add just the right amount of pathos and emotional resonance to a scene, without overdoing it? How can you craft a scene that truly tugs at the heart strings?

Invest the reader in the characters involved.

You don’t want your emotional moments to feel cheap, or that you manipulated the reader. Things have to come naturally within the flow of the story. To achieve this you must take the time to establish your characters and make them relatable to the reader. Take the time to fully develop the characters involved and give them a true voice and some depth of personality throughout the story leading up to your big emotional event.

Go big, or go small.

Larger-than-life events of grand importance to the story can get emotive responses because of the stakes involved. The big moments in your story are big for a reason, and you can let the gravity of the moment reflect in your characters’ behaviors. But you can also get an emotional response in quieter, more intimate moments. When moments are more intimate, there is an inherent connection with the reader, almost a feeling that they are witnessing something that they really aren’t supposed to see. This adds to the resonance because it feels as if the story is truly letting its guard down and inviting the reader into its inner workings. With an intimate moment, there are no other distractions from the moment to dilute or water down its emotional impact.

The devil is in the details.

Body language, choice of words and actions, facial expression, vocal inflection, even cadence of speech and the inherent rhythm of the flow of action can all have an effect on how emotional a scene is. Something even as simple as the goblin girl’s key phrase “Hearts must give” evokes an emotive response. Even the smallest details can add to the emotional impact of a moment.

Let it breathe.

Don’t fall into the temptation of trying to tell the reader what to feel. Present the action of the scene, and if you can get into the heads of one or more of the characters, all the more better. But you don’t want to overdo it. When a reader feels they have been manipulated and forced to feel a certain way, that can take them out of the story. Make the moment feel organic, like it was a natural progression from what had happened leading up to it, and then let the moment create the resonance for itself.

Read it over.

Once you’ve finished your scene. Read it back over and let someone else read it (or like I did, read it aloud to somebody else). The best way to tell if it tugs at the reader’s heart strings is to literally see if it tugs at a reader’s heart strings. If somebody else is reading or hearing the scene, get feedback from them on how the scene makes them feel, if their feeling is logical and if the scene makes sense.

To illustrate my point, here is the Terry Pratchett book in question. Pratchett had a great way of getting you to emphasize with unlikely characters, and he does it again with the goblins in this book. Check out “Snuff.”

Snuff, by Terry Pratchett

The City as a Character

Quan

If you’ve ever read fiction reviews, you may have heard the phrase “The City is a character within itself.” have you ever wondered what that means? How can an inanimate, non-sentient location become an actual character? Well, obviously this is not to be taken in a literal sense. When the location a story is set in is so vivid, and engaging that it takes a life of its own, then that is what this phrase refers to.

Think of some of the more iconic locations in fiction. Whether it be Castle Rock in many Steven King novels, or The Shire in The Lord of the Rings books, or Terry Pratchett’s Discworld locations, or even the cities of Metropolis and Gotham in comic books, these are iconic locations that are more than just a static backdrop for the characters to operate in. Much more.

What makes these places so memorable? The answer lies in how they are portrayed. These locations are presented with such ambiance and detail that they can function as fully realized areas independent of the characters operating within them. When you hear of Gotham, you can see Gotham in your mind’s eye and actually envision life there, Batman or no Batman.

The advantage of having such a well-developed locale for your story is that it adds a new layer of uniqueness to your story, and a new level of authenticity. If your location is so well developed that your story literally cannot happen anywhere else, then that is a great way to measure how well-developed your setting is. When the novel “Clockers” was adapted into film, Spike Lee was able to take the entire story out of its original Boston setting and place it squarely in Brooklyn, NY. I argue that if the locale had been better presented and made more integral to the story Spike would not have been able to do that.

Just as characters can have varying levels of depth, so can settings. Anything and everything can be used to bring a location to life. Here are some things you can highlight to do just that.

1. Geography

A locale’s geography and architecture can play a key role in making the city unique. When writing, be sure to include landmarks, specific locations, and descriptions of some of the more notable parts of the city. Include street names and building names whenever you can. Mention local businesses, parks, and monuments, even if they aren’t the focus of your scene. These details will help your reader be able to see the city in their mind’s eye.

2. Local weather

You can really define a locale by its weather. Is your setting in Sunny Los Angeles, Muggy Miami, Snowy Denver or Rainy Seattle? Describing the weather of you locale can also serve to set a certain mood and tone for your story, and also the mood of your characters.

3. History

Adding references to the locale’s history can also add to the character of a locale. If a building your characters are at has some historical significance, that can add a great deal of gravitas to whatever is happening there. Furthermore, if a city has any dark secrets in its past, you can really have that play into what is currently going on in your story.

4. Local slang, customs, fashion, cuisine

What is life like for the average folk at your locale? What are the aspects of life there that are unique to that area? Whenever I write about specific cities like Chicago or Detroit, I love to include the local cuisine, especially the hot dogs the city is famous for (i.e. Chicago Dogs or Detroit Coney Dogs). If you can actually describe how the food tastes, all the more better. The local slang and colloquialisms can also set the place apart, along with the way people in that area dress.

All of these techniques, especially if combined, can really give your locale a distinct character and feel. Adding these details can really help your reader visualize the place and feel like he or she is actually there. When that happens, then the setting becomes an integral part of the story, almost like it was a character unto itself.

Writing Believable Dialogue

Quan

One of the key elements of a good story is the dialogue between characters. Any story that has people interacting will show their conversations, and that is an important aspect in conveying an engaging, believable story. People can reveal a lot about themselves and their world through their dialogue. With good dialogue you can establish everything from character traits to plot elements to setting. You can tell the reader the what, why, how and where using just dialogue, and you can also use it to point out key details in the plot that you want readers to know. It is a versatile tool you have at your disposal that can convey a lot about your story when used well.

Writing good dialogue can be tricky. You want the conversation to flow naturally and sound authentic. You don’t want “talking heads” where it’s just two disembodied voices talking back and forth with nothing else happening (or do you? I’ve read some compelling stories that were nothing but two talking heads. I think this is the exception and not the rule, though). You want your people to sound like actual people with real personalities and quirks. So how can you do this?

I’ve been told that writing dialogue is one of my strengths. These are some of the techniques I use to handle it.

REAL LIFE INFLUENCE

Always listen to how people talk and converse. You will be surprised at how much you learn about how people talk just by listening to how people talk. Follow the ebb and flow of their conversation. Every dialogue has a rhythm and a poetry to it, regardless of who is talking or how they talk. Pay attention to that. You might also hear some cool antec dotes you can use in future stories. Some of the coolest dialogue from supporting characters in my book The Hand You’re Dealt came directly from people I was standing near while waiting to sell my blood plasma (Yes, that aspect of the story is quite autobiographical.)

BODY LANGUAGE

Body language and facial expression is also an important part of writing believable dialogue. People are twitchy, and nobody is just sitting perfectly still while talking. Take time to mention what their bodies and faces are doing while they are talking. You can convey a lot about what a character is thinking or feeling as they talk this way. Oftentimes, I will describe a character’s small action before they say something instead of using “he said.” Because it does a dual job of indicating who is talking while also giving some of that movement to the character. This also applies to giving a brief description of what is going through the POV character’s mind as they speak.

GRAMMAR

People don’t use proper grammar when they talk, not even English teachers. People talk in fragments, have unfinished thoughts, stumble over words, use incorrect phraseology, use filler words like um and uh, cut each other off and try to finish each other’s sentences. When writing dialogue, you want to utilize those quirks to make the conversation, and the characters, more believable. Save the soliloquies for Shakespeare.

SLANG

Pay attention to slang and local colloquialisms. If you’re writing a character from New York, that person is going to sound and talk quite differently than a person from Atlanta. Slang words and different pronunciations can be a great teller of where they are from and what their culture is, and in that instance you can be forgiven for intentional misspellings. I got into quite a few arguments with my Beta readers and editors over a New Yorker I put in The Hand You’re Dealt. They thought I misspelled one of his colloquialisms, and I had to repeatedly explain that he comes from a culture where People call each other “sun” (as in shining like the sun) instead of “son.” I got so tired of the fight I just switched to a different slang word.

Incorporating other languages can also be a key element in establishing a character. If a character comes from a unique culture, including a word or two from their native language will drive that point home. Just don’t overdo it: sprinkling in too many foreign words will make it blatant to the reader that you’re trying to make the character seem more ethnic.

THE WORD ‘SAID’

When writing dialogue, you tread a fine line when using the word “said.” You don’t want to overuse it, but at the same time, it can become quite obvious to readers when you are trying too hard to not use it. If you find yourself trying to come up with a new verb for talking every time you have somebody speak, then you are doing it too much, and you need to use “said” to give the reader a break. “Said” is usually an invisible word: the reader will read that and know what it means intrinsically without it interrupting the flow of the story. The key is to not use it ALL of the time lest you appear unimaginative. You also want to keep a lid on the flowery adjectives (which usually come right after you use the word “said”). Whatever you’re using that adjective to describe in what that character said should be self evident in whatever that character said and the actions and details around it. If you do that well, then the adjective becomes redundant.

TESTING IT OUT

Once you’ve written your dialogue, the next thing is to test it out. Don’t be afraid to read your dialogue out loud to see if everything sounds smooth and believable. Sometimes words and phrases that look good on paper (or your screen) won’t sound right when actually spoken, and that can be problematic if you want you dialogue to sound authentic.

These are some of the techniques I use when writing conversations. Give them a try and hopefully it will make your dialogue more memorable.

D’ya know who else excels at writing dialogue? Chuck Palahniuk! Check out this book from the creator of Fight Club and see for yourself.